Love Notes

Before all the technological advances that we have access to today, people used to send each other love letters.  Some may still write letters to their partner but there are many that just don't have the time or don't feel that they are creative enough to write a lovely prose. 

We now have access to things like email and text messaging to share intimate moments while we are away from our partner.  I also think that post it notes are a simple and wonderful tool.

It is up to you whether you choose to leave a romantic note, uplifting quote or an explicit bit of foreplay for the mind.  These little notes can be left in a lunch box or briefcase for your partner to find later.  Coat pockets, or pants pockets with a kind little pat to follow as he/she walks out the door are great ways to share yourself with your partner.  You could also stick one to his/her steering wheel for him/her to find before he/she drives to work.  All of these little thoughts you have placed for your partner to find are going to play on his/her mind all day long, talk about a nice way to build the anticipation.  These notes can have a great impact on a person's outlook on their day, turning a bad day around and giving your partner a reason to smile.

These little notes are great for the children as well.  It is a little like giving them a hug even when you can't be with them.

Are you doing this daily?

Every day we should be doing things that will strengthen our relationship.  Do you tell your partner that you love them every day?  How many times a day?  Each one of us should be expressing our love and affection to our partner every day, many times a day.  You never know when something could happen and you never have the opportunity to tell your partner, ever again. 

Do you kiss your partner every morning before you leave for work or errands?  What if you got into a car accident and didn’t come home?  Kiss your partner often, not just when you are looking for something more to happen.  I guarantee that if you kiss your partner with passion and anything were to happen to you, they will remember that kiss and hold it close to their heart for years to come.

Do you touch your partner, caress, hold hands and hug?  Every day, all throughout the day, you should be sharing simple little touches of affection.  There are all kinds of touches that are appropriate for any location.  Place your hand on the small of her back as you walk through a door.  Hold hands while you walk from your car to your destination.  Hug your partner from behind while they are preparing a meal or doing the dishes.  Little things like this, with no strings attached, help to strengthen the bond between a couple.

Sexy mind, focused mind

Our biggest sex organ is our mind.  Your brain can create wonderful fantasies and detailed images.  It can also be the glitch that throws a wrench in the works.  Our minds are often focused on the stresses of our daily life.  What to prepare for dinner, when the bills are due and the latest project at work are just a few possible thoughts that run through our minds. 

We can train our brains to be in the moment, enjoying every bit of what is going on here and now.  The first key is to take a moment to relax.  A bath, a walk or a meditation are all great ways to get this started.   The second key is to learn to refocus your mind.  Each time your mind wanders away from the current moment, bring back your attention to something specific that is right in front of you.  For instance you are taking a walk through a park.  If your mind begins to wander off to thoughts about a work project, take a moment to focus on specific details about the path you are walking on or plants that are near.  This may even mean stopping and really giving your undivided attention to a bush or flower.  Notice the color and textures.   As you practice redirecting your mind it will become easier to remain in the moment.  Meditation is a wonderful tool for both relaxing and focusing the mind.

Often times, especially with women, our minds wander away from the moment and pull our attention and energy away from intimate moments with our partner.  Learning to refocus and quiet the chatter in our minds will help us to be in the moment and really enjoy all the wonderful sensations.  If your mind does wander while you are in an intimate moment there are two really good options to bring your mind back to the intimacy.  First would be to redirect  your mind with focus on something specific.  This could be your partners lips, chest or arm muscles flexing or any action that you enjoy watching.  Another option would be to focus your mind on a memory or fantasy about an intimate moment. 

I know this is much easier said than done, but with practice your mind will learn to be more in the moment and refocus quickly when it does wander off.  Trust me, the time and effort you put into training your mind to be in the moment will pay off big time.  When you are able to keep your mind from wandering and really focus on all the sensations that you may have been missing, your potential for mind blowing intimacy is increased exponentially. 

This will improve many other portions of your life as well.  You will be more in tune to your family, friends, work and may notice many things that you have let slip by each day unnoticed.  When you are completely focused and in the moment, performance in all areas will greatly improve.

Intimate discussion primers

For those who are a little unsure how to approach an intimate subject, leaving clues can be an awesome way to create the opportunity to explore.  Magazines, books and even websites contain lots of information for those that are willing to take a little time to search it out.  Leaving a web browser open with a website that you would like your partner to explore, as long as the kids won’t have access to it, is one way to leave your partner a clue.  Pages in a book or magazine that have been marked or highlighted are another good way.  Leaving clues like this is a great way to spark a bit of conversation about something you may be interested in.  Whether it is something you have not done before that you would like to try or a specific topic that you would like your partner to explore more.  For those who are a little unsure how to approach a subject, leaving clues can be an awesome way to create the opportunity to explore.

 

Red Riding Hood Adventure

Here is a fun idea to add a little variety and spice to your sex life.  A twist on the fairy tale that most of us know.

One twist would be for innocent Red to arrive at grandma's house to find the naughty wolf.  The wolf will take his own sweet time, giving Red a lesson she won't soon forget.  "What big teeth you have"...."the better to eat you with" will take on a whole new meaning.  After the wolf has lavished some attention on Red, she won't be hoping for the woodsman to arrive any time soon.

Another twist on this would be a naughty Red, dressed in just heels and her red hooded cape.  Red can tie up that bad wolf and torture him with her special kind of torture.  Just how much can that big, bad wolf take before he is begging for release?

Just remember to have fun with your fantasy!

Research

Wow, I have been doing a lot of research.  There is a lot of information out there for those that have the time to go looking.  I have found some information that is helpful and getting closer to what I am really looking for, but the search is far from over.  I have a long way to go to find all the information that I am seeking, but I am determined to keep searching to get all the information that I desire.

I am really digging deep into my research and trying to find all the information that I can that will help all who are seeking.  Cross your fingers that my searches will lead me directly to the information that I am searching for so I have the best information to share.

I have also been contemplating doing some groups sharing sessions.  I think that talking with others and finding out what information they are looking for as well as sharing stories of success and failures, will be helpful in providing the most complete information that I can.